I’ve always struggled with healthy romantic relationships, but I use to consider myself a hardcore romantic. Besides being an English major who obsessed over the romantic era, my childhood and teenage years were filled with pop punk love songs, 80s synth pop love songs, and rom-coms most people would say are bad like pre McConaissance Matthew McConaughey.
Despite being bad at society’s idea of love I have loved many, hard. I love random flings. I love my friends. I struggle with knowing what to do with that love. For every Future meme I post, a part of me knows I don’t believe in any of that shit but it’s easier to shove aside feelings of love and be a cynic in this traumatizing world.
There are many people I have feelings for at any given time and society would say it’s wrong but it isn’t. A friendship to me is like dating, just without the sexual relationship. I want the best for my friends, people I love, like people want for their romantic partners. If I’m wrong I don’t want to be right and if I’m right I’m living in the future.
I look forward to figuring out the truth. For now I hope all the lovers & lonely people know that inner peace and love is meant to be shared with each other in many ways. Find your peace. Find your love. And remember Valentine’s Day can be everyday if you want. It’s really as easy as showing love.
These songs are songs that match the vibe of where my heart is these days. People think I spend all year curating the playlist but I don’t. About a week before I start thinking about my feelings and deep dive into r&b to try and find what hits. I remember songs that I discovered or hit during the year. Sometimes things just pop up. For example I woke up Friday morning singing “The Promise” to myself and knew it had to be an outlier on this playlist. The songs are meant to make me feel okay with how I love. And meant to give away that love to my friends and whoever they want to listen to the playlist with.